When I signed up for the trip I had this notion in my head that these people needed me. I've seen the poverty commercials on television... there's so much heartache, right? So much disease? So much pain? So much hurting? Of course they need me. Of course they need my team. Of course they need our help. And even as the trip drew nearer, I continued to have these thoughts in my mind. We were going to do so much for them. These children don't have parents. They depend on other kids to survive. They need our love. They need our help. All I was thinking was, "How can I help? How can I make a difference?" I thought I was needed. These people have nothing, right? They fight just to fill their bellies once a day. They need my help, right? I have so much I can offer. I come from America for crying out loud. We have more things than we know what to do with. They need me.
Being there for two months, my whole perception was flipped upside down. I need them more than they need me. Much, much more. The joy these people had was incredible. They literally have nothing, yet they have so much joy, so much faith, and so much that they're thankful for. "I bought into the lie that circumstance defines happiness," but it does not. Like I said, these people have nothing, their circumstances are unimaginable. You'd think there'd be no happiness, no joy, no laughter, no smiles. All I saw in Africa were smiling faces, all I heard was laughter. It was incredible. Their faith was incredible. One lady we met on a home visit couldn't get out of bed and she'd been having migraines for months. She was in incredible pain, but I was blown away by the faith she had. She had so much to complain about, so much pain, yet she was rejoicing and praising her Father for the life she'd been given. And she had faith that He would heal her, and if not, it was okay, because there's be no suffering in Heaven. Would you be content and okay with having a migraine every day for the rest of your life? I know I wouldn't. But she was.
They showed us more love than we could have ever shown them. They changed my life. I realized I was the one that needed them. They showed me so much about how my joy should not depend on my circumstances. And I have not been living that out very well. I'm completely broke, and even though they showed me so much about that not mattering, I've been completely stressed and not finding any joy anything because of my circumstances. Who cares if I have no money? Who cares if I can't eat Chickfila whenever I have a craving? Who cares if my bill payments are a little late? They don't have food, yet they find joy in life. They don't let their circumstances determine their joy. They are full of smiling faces even though they are in the depths of poverty. I've been stressed over not having enough money for rent and bills and dues and groceries and I'm pretty sure it's been hard for me to crack a smile. But why? I should find joy in life. I should find joy in the little things God brings me. I want every single thing I saw in Africa to penetrate my heart so that I practice what I've been taught. I don't want my joy to be determined by the "next thing" I need or want. I want to be content and find joy in the circumstances that I'm in.
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