It’s always crazy to see how the Lord works and how faithful He is when He doesn’t tell you the whole story, but tells you that it’s going to be okay. I’ve learned that with every obstacle in my life, but I always seem to forget. However, God has a funny way of reminding me when I need it most.
Case in point, this past Christmas… I got some crazy news from some random guy that my mom was his birthmother. Seems like some wild plot from a Lifetime movie, am I right? I thought it was a complete joke or scam. But I couldn’t help but realize how much he looked like my mom, and me, for that matter. The only thing to do was talk to my mom. Sounds easy, right? Wrong. It is for me at least. I don’t do confrontation. It’s the one thing I cannot handle. I was absolutely scared to death. I kept fighting with God, wondering why it had to be me and why I had to be the one responsible with this news. I didn’t understand; I didn’t think I could take it. I know that everything the Lord does is good, but I was still scared to death. What if my dad didn’t know and it somehow split up my family? Several thoughts came to mind, but I had to keep reminding myself that God is good. Always good.
I found an awesome devotional in my new awesome Bible, and it had the perfect passage that gave my heart hope. It said, “There will be times in life when we can’t see the trail. Times when we get sidetracked by a big bump in the road. But we can rest assured that in those times, God will always takes us by our sweaty palms and lead us safely on.” I didn’t see the trail. I didn’t understand what the heck God was doing, but I had to trust that He would take my sweaty palms and lead me the safest way. I knew I couldn’t just ignore my possible half brother, and I would have to talk to my mom. I knew that was where God was leading me. And I knew that He would be faithful.
I can’t tell you how many times I reminded myself of that when I was getting ready to confront my mom. It took at least a week since I had to talk to my mom alone because I wasn’t sure if my dad knew, and that proved harder than I thought. The night I was going to talk to her fell through because she got home from work early. Finally I was able to talk to her like a week later. I thought I was going to throw up all day long. My body obviously doesn’t handle nerves well. She came in my room and sat on my bed because I texted her while she was at work that I needed to talk to her about something. I tell her the story of how JP contacted me and how he said she was his birthmother. She didn’t say anything and finally said she wondered if that day would ever come. It was official, I have a half brother. Then I saw how faithful God was, yet again. She was completely honest with me and said that the baby’s father didn’t want to have anything to do with it, and she thought the baby could have a better life with someone else rather than a single mother working at Kroger. Not only that, but she said that she told my dad before they got married. So, he already knew and accepted it and our family wasn’t going to fall apart. God is good.
Through them getting to communicate as well as me communicating with JP and his adopted mom, I saw how incredible God is and how amazing it was to play a part in their “reunion.” My mom was free. She had been carrying this around as a secret, and she was finally able to be free with everyone. She had wondered for 27 years whether she had done the right thing and if the baby she had carried for 9 months and given birth to was okay. Now she knew he had flourished in a loving home. JP was free as well. He had always known that he was adopted because his parents had been open with him, so he had wondered for 27 years if he was just some mistake and had been a burden to someone. There was a piece of his heart missing. Now he knows that he wasn’t just some bad mistake, that my mom had loved him enough to try and make the best decision for his own good. His heart is whole and he’s been smiling more now than he ever has been. Because God used me, my mom is free and JP doesn’t have a gaping hole in his heart anymore. Are there any more blessings God could have showered on us? Yes, yes there were. Turns out JP’s mother wasn’t able to have children, and three adoptions had already fallen through. They didn’t think they were going to have kids. But then she received a son, the greatest gift in the world. My mom changed her life forever. I don’t think the kid could have gotten a better mother. She brought him up in a loving, Christian home, and she would do anything for him. She sent my mom a loving letter and told her what a priceless gift she had given her. My mom knew that she had made the right decision, and realized what an unbelievable impact on others that decision had made. God is good. God is faithful.
And it doesn’t end there. For 27 years, JP had the dream of meeting his birthmother. A dream he probably thought would never come true. A week ago, that dream did come true. He met his birthmother. And I met my half brother. After lots of tears from his mother, my mother, and everyone else, our family has grown. Not many people get a new family for Christmas. We did :)
My path might have been difficult, but God led me safely on. He was faithful. He allowed little ol’ me to help change the lives of so many people, my mom and new brother being two of them. I can’t tell you how bad I didn’t want to listen to God and wanted to take the easy way out. Think if I had. Think of all these blessings we would have missed out on. God knows what He’s doing. God is always good. He is always faithful.
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